Because
by Suffering Angel
Summary: Everything's going perfectly between them... yet he had to ask himself 'why'. The answer, it turned out - was known to him all along.Rated for mature themes of a sexual nature


I don't own Kingdom Hearts.

As you might've been able to tell by the rating, this displays sexual themes, though not as a main concept in the fic. It's sort of an 'in between' conversation when they're... _recovering_.

Enjoy.

* * *

_**Because**_

The bed made just that morning was already a mess. The blankets were pushed aside early on, having no role to play in the events that had transpired repeatedly for the last several hours. Sheets wrinkled and pulled at were soaked with sweat, tears and semen. Soft pants and breathing were the only things breaking the delicate silence the heated screams had left behind them.

Two bodies rested in the midst of it all, curled up next to and around each other, their minds tilting between awareness and the sleep so temptingly lulling them away.

It had been a long day…

Riku hadn't really thought about the consequences when he asked the other teen to spend the day with him.

He didn't plan on going all over the town, or ending up in the hotel on the very outskirts of it, next to the Exit of that World.

He didn't expect things to go that well, let alone – that far. Needless to say, then –

He hardly expected Sora would agree – to any of it.

Yet there they were the both of them, spent and drained and satisfied, their essences still sticking to each other's bodies.

So messy, so dirty… and yet he couldn't stop wondering how utterly beautiful the brunette was, his cheeks still flared, lips still swollen with the final sparks of lust and want ebbing away. The sweat still trickling down his naked body glistered in the moonlight filtering past the waving curtains, giving his sun-kissed skin a bronze-like glow. Riku chuckled softly as he ran a hand down the boy's arm; he seemed like a marvelous human-shaped creation of the Gods, placed there by the Creators themselves simply for him to enjoy.

All for him…

All his.

Was it really so, though, a part of him asked bitterly. Was it truly a gift, a miracle he had ever so undeservingly been graced with… or was it simply a test, or worse yet –

Mockery?

An Angel placed before him like a worm before a hungry fish, delicious and approachable while blinding the prey to the hook around which it was wrapped…

Yet was it truly an Angel, he had to wonder, eyes searching answers in closed eyelids.

He had merely touched Sora; it was the other that kissed him first.

He tasted like fresh spring water and oranges and caramel… and Riku simply had to take more and more until he consumed him whole.

A part of him wished the boy never let him do so, for had he refused –

Riku wouldn't have been tormented with asking himself 'why'.

Why did Sora let him?

Why did that boy, already a teenager yet still so innocent and unaware, so disinterested in both boys and girls when confronted by women and men – why would such a pure, untainted being let his best friend for years take that innocence and shatter it into a million tiny pieces to be scattered across the night's skies?

Why?

Why…

"Ri… ku?"

Riku felt himself tense. The question was uttered silently, Sora's eyes opening a mere slit. A soft smile gracing his features, Riku pushed himself up on an elbow and rested his head over his open palm. His other hand was still trailing up and down Sora's arm.

"Hey… did I wake you up?" he asked in a soft whisper, only to be answered with a small shake of the head and a deep yawn indicating otherwise. He had to chuckle.

"Sleepy kitten…"

"Purr." Sora replied rather mockingly before throwing an arm around Riku's waists and pulling himself closer. Riku's smile softened as his blush returned and he simply held Sora close, happily nuzzling into the other's chocolaty mane.

He let himself enjoy the closeness for a long moment more before feeling Sora's breathing soften and his Heart – beating against Riku's own – slow down its pace ever so slightly.

The boy was falling back asleep… maybe now he could… ask…

"Say… Sora?"

He gulped at the distant hum arguably sent his way.

"Are you asleep? Can I… can I ask you something?"

Sora groaned, seeing how he was disturbed in the middle of nibbling on Riku's collar bone sleepily.

"Those w're… tw' 'estions… 'iKuu…"

Riku chuckled sheepishly and poked Sora's side, making the boy wiggle against him. Heh… so cute…

"Guess so… Imma ask another one now though." He rather declared, making for a slightly awkward silence afterwards.

"…go on" Sora purred in amusement as he pulled up to poke Riku's chin with his nose. The older teen took a deep breath before heeding that urging.

"Well, I…" Gulp. "I just wanted to know…"

"…to know…?"

Riku sighed. No way… out of it now… was there?

"I wanted… to know _why_."

He gulped again and pressed his lips into a thin line.

Sora could only blink at him in return.

"Why… does the water swirl right to left in some places but not others? Why there's never really day or night in Twilight Town? Why did the chicken cross the road? …you're gonna have to be… a bit more specific, Riku…"

Riku could only stare for a long moment before shaking his head with a soft, awkward fit of laughter. "Guess… I do…" He stalled for quite a while afterwards as well though, his hand going over Sora's back while he pondered his innocence and naivety, apparently all still very much intact.

And then Sora bit his shoulder – gently.

"Ruuu!" The brunette pouted, angrily poking the bitten shoulder with his nose.

Riku sighed and closed his eyes, hold tightening around Sora's body as he was suddenly filled with fear. It was the most absurd fit of fright he was ever struck with, yet he couldn't very much help it.

He was suddenly so very afraid Sora would disappear on him.

The worst part was that he knew he'd deserve it.

"Why… did you let me do it to you?"

The question came out a desperate whisper, and despite his best efforts to keep the boy close, his face buried in Riku's shoulder, Sora pushed himself away enough as to attain eye-contact.

Riku had to admit he was surprised. While he did expect a reaction… none of the emotions he assumed he would see reflecting in those blue eyes were confusion, let alone a touch of ridicule.

Perhaps he should've phrased that otherwise…

"Huh?"

Riku felt his cheeks redden violently. He pulled a hand back to scratch the back of his neck, eyes darting everywhere but Sora as he used well the distance the other put between them. "Well… I… you see…" He sucked in a deep breath before shaking his head.

"…forget it."

It was then Sora reached for his pillow and was about to connect between it and Riku's face. The older protected his head with his arms, the action, apparently – taking the last bits of rational thought away from him.

"Why did you sleep with me?!"

He still expected the blow to land; it didn't. Opening his eyes, Riku peeked at Sora between his arms, only to find the boy as pale as a ghost, his blue eyes peeled open so wide Riku could've sworn for a minute there was mostly white staring at him. More than anything, he couldn't ignore the sudden, evident scent of _fright_.

"So-"

"Was it bad?"

…_not_ the reaction he was expecting.

"…wha-"

Sora crouched on the bed then, the pillow all but discarded as he pulled closer to Riku, eyes set on the other's own worriedly. "Wasn't I supposed to? …didn't you want me to? Did I do something wrong? …Riku!"

The boy looked so panicked Riku couldn't help but put a hand on his head and ruffle his hair. While at first it seemed the gesture was wasted, Riku hoped as he kept shifting his fingers through the soft spikes – that it wasn't his mind playing tricks on him, how Sora seemed to relax, even if ever so lightly.

"That's… not what I meant." He replied with his blush deepening, and he found himself unable to look at Sora any longer.

"I'm… _happy_ you did that… really… more than you can ever imagine, I swear it… it's just that… I'm…"

"Just…?" Sora edged, absently rubbing his head against Riku's hand. He refused to let himself admit how happy he was too, though… as long as Riku seemed so distressed.

"Just… you never showed interest in… well…" This… was to be embarrassing. "In _girls_. Seeing how I'm not one, let it be said you never showed too much interest in _boys_, either."

"Neither did you." Sora remarked plainly, making Riku pull away rather sheepishly.

"Well… sure, but… I mean…"

" 'Why me'? " Sora offered gently, earning himself a hesitant nod. He sighed and shook his head before reaching for Riku's hand to give it a tight squeeze.

"Why _me_ then?" He asked back, a grin spreading over his lips as Riku gapped like a fish.

"I… what?"

The brunette chuckled before poking the other on the nose. "Just that. Why did _you_ do it with _me_ and not anyone else?"

The older teen stared at him for a long moment before lowering his gaze. "Well… because… I…" His voice broke, falling to barely over a whisper. "I… _care_… about you…" Riku admitted sheepishly, frowning when that made _Sora_ ruffled _his_ hair. His grin, however, held far more warmth and a touch of adultness that had Riku staring.

"…then we're even." He concluded and sat back down, looking quite pleased with his answer.

Riku, however, didn't seem to share his enthusiasm. "You also care about other people… people like _Kairi_…" The name came out ever so bitterly… and yet all Sora could do was blink.

"Well… don't you, too? Care about other people, I mean…"

Riku's lips pursed as he brought a hand to cup Sora's cheek, his thumb as though wiping tears that weren't there.

No, he knew inwardly, even as those blue eyes demanded an explanation from him. He knew that answer for so long now… the answer was almost painfully a 'no'.

No one else mattered, not even Riku himself. Only Sora…

And yet that would pain the brunette, he knew, and thus kept quiet… so much that Sora's face twisted with a frown born of worry and concern.

"Riku?"

"…not as much… as I care about you." Came the eventual reply and Riku looked away, only to have Sora poke his forehead.

"…silly. I already told you, didn't I?!" Sora huffed, cheeks puffed. "I feel the same!"

Riku had to sigh, concluding to himself there was small point in thinking how he was over-thinking Sora's replies. This already was… so much harder than he thought…

"Yes, well… _we_ are different… so…" He took a deep breath, taking Sora's silence and confused expression as a sign to go on. "So… so we care differently about… other people…" That was… a good enough way to put it… "You're… my best friend since I can remember." He went on as though to himself. "The… closest person to me…" He found himself reaching for Sora's hands, holding on almost too tightly.

"But that's… just _me_." Riku added then somewhat sadly before sucking in a deep breath and looking straight at Sora. "How about _you_?"

"Why… do I…?"

Blue eyes turned away; Sora didn't want to reply. Riku, however, needed him to – badly.

"You're different. You're warm, and friendly, and you open up to people. You could have anyone you wanted if you really tried… like… like Kairi. Or… or I don't know, _Leon_. Or…"

"You." Sora's voice cut Riku's stuttering in half, leaving the other disoriented in light of the determined look in his cobalt spheres.

The eternity in which they locked eyes was broken eventually and it was Riku who looked away, eyes lowering in almost shame.

"But… _why_? …is all I'm asking."

The look Sora gave him was mostly a disbelieving one, if not also a hurt one.

"Why you…"

"Yes."

"Why not… Yuffie, or, or Leon, or…"

'Kairi', but neither really wanted to bring that name up again.

"…yes."

Sora sighed – and then reached to hit Riku lightly over the head. Leaning a bit forward then, he gave Riku a long, stern look, as though trying to see whether despite it all – he was joking.

Seeing that was hardly the case, along with quite a mild portion of growing distress gathering, Sora just sighed and ruffled Riku's hair again, the grin that oddly enough split his face in two making him seem not a day older than the child he was when they first left the Islands those years ago.

"Why'd I ever want anyone else? You're _Riku_!" He announced gleefully, cheeks painted red. He seemed ever so satisfied with the explanation so he added no more, as though even a mere breath in addition would be too much – a wasted effort.

Riku on his part could only stare, blinking when Sora – having not a word more to spare – curled up over his lap with a soft purr. The older teen's hands moved on their own around him, fingers shifting over tanned skin and through brown, spiky locks.

…that was the answer he was struggling for that was staring at him all this time, wasn't it?

Sora said it – he liked Riku for Riku. Because Riku was whom he was… himself, and no one else…

Wasn't that… the same for him, as well? There were not enough stars in the sky to count off the things he liked about Sora… _loved_… about Sora… and wasn't that, also, because simply enough –

Sora was Sora?

Because he was who he was… because he was this person Riku could love so much…

That he did?

"Heh…" Riku chuckled then, relaxing with the other all but limp in his arms. Sora was right… it –was- as simple as that.

They were them. No one else could replace them, and they were no one else.

Wasn't that… reason enough for them to be together like this?

No 'whys', nor 'how's. No 'what if's.

Sora was Sora.

Riku was Riku.

That was good enough…

"Riku?"

"Mm?"

"…I wanna go again."

Just because.

"…aah."


End file.
